I will start off by saying this, I thought we were past all the jump scares? Back in the early to mid-2000s there were a lot of horror movies that tried to get people with the good ole jump scare and it got old…fast. The best way to describe Quija, loud noise scare…attempts and jump scare attempts. This movie, it takes a board game and makes it into a horror movie. It is like the old days when no one could figure out how to make a video game into a movie…which is still happening.
Coming next fall, Jenga, the motion picture!
To write a review on this movie…is hard to do. I did not really like it and to be honest, I really tried to get into the movie. The cast was generic and I did not care about a single character. The story was painfully dull and predictable. I just read, the movie had to go through re-shoots because it tested poorly in advanced screenings…I cannot imagine anything worse than this…wait, World War Z was worse, no joke.
I bought this movie, yeah that’s right, I own Ouija. Luckily it is pre-owned from one of the remaining video rental stores and it was only two dollars. Stiles White made this movie…Stiles, like from Teen-Wolf? He wrote a few horror movies like, Boogeymen, which is a joke and The Possession. The Possession wasn’t too bad, it does have Jeffery Dean Morgan.
Back to the movie itself. I want to talk about the writing a little. It was poor, there really was no character development. I know, this is a horror movie, but come on…give me something. The twist ending was obvious, something about the story did not add up and before we discover the truth, I pointed at my wife and told her the ending. I was correct. Hell, I should write a horror movie…it would be called “Rayzor Watches Ouija”. Watching me, watch this movie may have been more entertaining, as I kept checking my Twitter feed, Facebook and our new Instagram page. I did at one point get up to get an ice cold glass of Cherry Dr. Pepper…
If you have seen Ouija and liked it, please help me understand. Now, before I leave you with my final score for this fake ass horror film…I will tell you, there is a prequel coming later this year. It looks better than this farce. Our dear friend Millennial Morgan posted the trailer a few weeks ago, which you can view here. Looks like there will be more closing mouths…jeez.
You know what, this movie cost $5 million to make and the marketing team must have been good. Ouija grossed over $100 million.
IMDB.com rates Ouija at 4.4 and that is about right!
Rayzor’s rating of Ouija is 3.6.
Anyone want a copy of Ouija on Blu-Ray?
